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Dog Captain

Seafaring with a pipe is one of the most noble things a person can do. Until now, becoming such a badass required the expensive commitment of buying a captain's hat which can cost $100 for a nice one and pipe. Our scientists have developed a solution to this age old problem by printing these shirts.

Bitches will go wild. Caution: Wearing near a dog park is a mistake. If you do, wear rain boots.